But.

This time.

IT'S SENIOR YEAR! (thunderous applause)

You know what this means ladies and germs? It means that
I won't be going to (high) school next year!

1. No more waking up at 5:30 in the morning!
2. No more midgety high school freshmen who act like they should be outside the MTV Studios in the crowd during TRL!
3. NO MORE...uh...BAD HIGH SCHOOL STUFF!

But I can hear all my dozens (and dozens) of fans posing the question--what does our hero intend on doing with his life? To be blunt--

I have no fux0ring idea.

The popular thing to do recently seems to be going to college...but personally, college both cramps my style (Tests you can't pass without studying? Guwah!) and my budget. Not to mention that college is overrated. I mean, I know some people with degrees who couldn't get a job waxing Monica Lewinski's legs. Nowadays it seems its more about skill and masters degrees, rather than lack of skill and 4 year degrees.

But what does this all have to do with videogames? To put it implicitly, I already KNOW what I wanna do with my life.

I wanna be a Gamefan editor.

Quite simplistic, non? Although I have no real idea how much it pays, I figure "Why eat regularly and have a clean apartment when you could play videogames for a living?" And since my logic has yet to fail me, a gaming magazine Ed job is seemingly perfect for me. But there's another finch in the abercombie--GF and GFO only hire staffers of 21 years of age. I have no idea why, I can only assume that it's ECM getting people drunk to the point where they'll actually review games like Superman 64 and ECW. So that leaves me with a HUGE FREAKING three years to fill. What can I do in the meantime? Should I risk my what's left of my sanity and go to college? Should I travel the continent, visiting my TNL and Perfect Zero compadres (and bring them tidings of fried shrimp?) Should I stay at home and leech off the folks? Or should I spend the time in rigorous martial arts training so that when I go to E3, I can kill whoever at Gamefan is responsible for this blatant age discrimination? The future is unclear. But whatever the future holds... I'll probably be there, on the recieving end of the Bitch Slaps of Fate (TM).

Excelsior!

··· Riisuke